My fantasies..
I think they’re starting to leave my head now.. I really miss thinking about them, but knowing that those things can’t happen anymore, it’s just fading away slowly. I think I might have discovered that there are better things in this world that I want now that I’m growing up that are also reachable. I can’t wait..
Getting myself checked today.
I’m scared. O_O
The Labyrinth
One of the awesomest movies EVAH! :D I’m in love with all the characters and the storyline, and how it kind of connects to people like me. I admittedly can say that I like to think of Brian as Jareth and me as Sarah >///<. Brian’s one of the hot controlling and compelling characters in my life and I feel like the child-like girl who’s dying to be a princess one day. Like Sarah, I own teddy bears, I’m somewhat selfish and whine a lot. Sometimes Bri gives me a reminder to grow up and the occasional “Welcome to Adulthood” line. Meh.. But anyway, my favorite scenes in the Labyrinth that just get to me is when Jareth dances with Sarah at the ballroom created by her fantasy triggered by eating the enchanted peach. He gives her that seductive stare as Brian does when…. ahem. Anyway! My next favorite scene is the very last one where Jareth is all EPIC and coming out of the shadows of the broken Labyrinth and when he tells Sarah, “Look what I’m offering you.. Your dreams..” and “Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave..” *fangirls out* Yeah.. You know what I mean. My boyfriend has kind of the same motives as Jareth. When he feels like he holds power, he becomes proud of himself. It’s truly cute. Is power sexy? According to this chick *points at self*, I think it is..
xD My coworkers would love this quote.
Am I there yet? Because I realize that I’ve recently shed tears about failure. Shall I view it as a beautiful thing since I’ve failed many times before this? I’m starting to feel like I should. It somewhat brings me hope. I CAN be innovative. <3
It’s been bugging me..
I think that I’m more emotionally affected than most people I know. Memories are well kept in my head while they slowly wither away in the other person’s mind. Like when I’m in a certain mood, more specifically in a happy or a very “deeply inspired” one, I feel like the person has very little regard to what I’m feeling. Like when I share something from the past that once meant a ton goes away as years go by. I still feel bubbly inside when I bring it up, yet the other person doesn’t feel the same about it anymore. Meh. Should I change myself and become like that because my memories are worthless or should I not have a reason to change the way my heart feels? All I know is that no matter what I do, I can’t change the latter. I confuse myself sometimes.
Who is this song?
I feel that I have an idea coming along specifically for my Tumblr. I’m going to post YouTube links/audio that remind me of someone. You’re welcome to answer, if you like.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8s8YK4R5qa0
A little sad..
Dear head,
You did a great job selecting the military as your job right after 18 years hit. You were pretty damn smart in high school, but it totally screwed up once you procrastinated to sign up for colleges. You bet your lazy ass that you didn’t want to do this in the first place, but hey, you made yourself choose it. It’s a great job, I have to admit, but you know it isn’t your full dream. It was your only choice to be stable. The trade off was home and your main man. You kinda screwed your dream up, but you kinda didn’t at the same time though. The good side now is that I’m currently with dad rather than being under the heavy burden of mom’s will, I got your permit, work at a nice job to learn from before hitting the real big time job once I leave, and most of all giving me independence, leading me to grow into a woman. You now know how to communicate with people regularly to the point where no one knew you were an otaku in high school. Good job, brain. Good job. You’ve motivated me to push myself to get the things I want out of life and it’s imperative that you keep me going.
Sincerely,
Amber
***********************
Dear heart,
You’re really been screwing me up lately. You get the best of me in so many ways. You’re the only damn thing that gets in my way whenever I try to succeed in something. You caused me to love too easily, you tried so hard to cling to my family harder than I wanted once I turned 18, my innocence is gone because of you, people control me easily if you give them too much love, you make me a jealous person and most of all you’re being torn right down the middle every time you think of the man you love most because you’re afraid once I leave, he’ll be gone. I just want to let you know that I need you to be tough no matter what the situation is. Your flesh is soft inside and out. It’s time to harden up a little. Just a little. I want you to still be you, but just a less needy and insecure “you”. I want you to make me feel beautiful inside and out. If I lose all my hair, I want you to tell me that I’m still the number one girl. I want flowers to blossom within me so filled with love and life that they wrap around my soul to give me a big hug. I want you to also believe that Jesus & God love you with everything they have no matter what happens to you. Sing.. <3 Simply sing when things get boring or unhappy or whenever you feel great. Please also whenever you get your tears, cuts, “heart-drops” and bruises, heal quicker every time something causes hurt. I know you’re strong, but I know you’re not done yet.
Love,
Amber <3
 [Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]Title: Help I'm Alive (The Twelves Remix)
Artist: Metric
0 plays
I heard this song while working. Music doesn’t really need to make sense honestly, but I get this cool vibe simply because of the multiple layers of sound in it and that catchy beat <3 Makes me feel cool working in retail when hearing this song because it feels like theme music while I wear the cutest clothes xD
Just testing…
Tumblr, if this post is on my facebook, you suck.
-Amber
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